What's up with anime these days?

Now good old DiabolicalD Daimyo likes to masturbate as much as the next random smub of an anime fan. But what he doesn’t like is fans who think that mainstream anime is a personal outlet to all your weird and bizarre fetishes(they don't need to think it's now a reality).  Let’s face it we know what mainstream anime has been used for the last couple years. Fapping and tons of fapping. There’s no beating around the bush.

Bonus points for fapping in those target areas.

I mean we could all debate the philosphical issues in a show like strike witches,  discuss how emotionally connected each character is to another,  talk about the (not so) complex plot structure or we could just plain fap. Let’s not kid ourselves we’d all choose the last option. You know bad enough as it is to  make one of these shows but they had to make a sequel. I guess it’s true what they say, the anime industry literally has its hands full these days.

Praise kami another useless sequel

Look we get that the point that when you make anime that is fappable and watchable you get $$$. But most of what you make is half-ass recycles of the same shit we saw before. Now I wouldn’t mind a show with fanservice here and there but not everywhere. If I want to fap(and fap hard I will) I’ll watch some hentai. Seriously, atleast hentai doesn’t try to sugarcoat its shit like alot of modern anime does. Hentai goes straight into what it wants and expects you to do. Infact, hentai wads through half the bullshit regular ecchi-fanservice obsessed anime puts you through. You don’t have to imagine the characters getting fucked, you don’t have to think of weird incest shippings. Infact you don’t have do anything but fap. Most of all you’re not fooling yourself into thinking that what you’re watching is full of substance(wet substance maybe).

There's a 90% you'll find a hentai out there that does this better. 

Some of you might think I’m bitching(manri rant I say) and if I don’t like it don’t watch. But that’s the thing there’s hardly anything else for me to watch. Every season there’s maybe like 1 or 3 shows that I think I might consider watching just based on the synopsis but when I actually past the 1st episode it’s the same crap I’ve known to love and hate (I love to fap, but hate to fap to little girls). So as you can see I’m pretty much alienated from an alternative. I’ll look at a show like star driver and think wow that’s a pretty badasss story from the plot info but when I get to episode 1 I’m thinking wtf. Mecha you can fap to? Wherever Char and Amuro are (mexico?) they’re probably crying.
The bottomline: You’re definitely not going to find shows like this today:

I dare you to loli fap to this.

I mean arguably the most recent anime that I saw that still had that had that epic feeling to it was fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood. But let’s face it, we needed an extra series to get it right.


You know it's going to get a lot worse before it gets better. This just in, you guys know madhouse, right? The studio responsible for a ton of gar and badass anime(Akagi, Ninjascroll, deathnote, etc.). Well guess what they just got bought by nihon tv. The reason? They couldnt pay the bills. But really who can blame them when some of their best selling stuff of all time is crap like this.

If highschool really was like this I wouldn't be a virgin.

It's fucking bullshit man. When crap like this sells good it's like taking a shit on the already poor standards. If paying the bills is a concern I'd rather see you guys do more sub par marvel adaptations. Oh Kaiji season 2 how far away you look to me right now. Hopefully, you will become the messiah to my anime prayers.


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Densetsu no Yuusha no Densetsu (Legend of the legendary heroes) Review

With a name as awesome and long as that, this show has to be great. Right? We'll just have to see, because as I write this I am only on episode 21 and have yet to complete this series. My thoughts so far? There are many but stay toasty(frosty?) and use the magic of time travel to...

So roneri

Well, that was something. Did it make any sense? No. But it was definitely something alright. Before I start I have a theory on the origin of this show's name. Ok so Kagami Takaya is sitting alone(he's roneri) on a chair...er kotatsu, he just finished watching legend of the galactic heroes for the 369th time and he's thinking "I want to make an epic story of my own". So you know what he does? He goes to his favourite dealer buys some opium and then starts writting stuff. After a sensation of high he gets all these crazy ideas about magic eye bearers, taboo breakers and women that appear out of no where. It's all going well but all he needs now is a name. However suddenly, he runs out of opium and he's thinking he better do something before his withdrawal symptoms start kicking back in. Takaya being the maverick that he his, decides to watch an episode of LOGH. It is then it occurs to him, why not call this show Legend of the legendary legends (DenDenDen)? Because it sounds fucking retard that's why. 10 Hours later and more opium he comes up with the satisfying and only slightly less retarded name Densetsu no Yuusha Densetsu.

Somebody's got some s'explaining to do

Well, now that we've gotten the story about how this show's name came to be out of the way, let us move on to the plot. The plot is exactly as written in the title; the primary (and often ignored) story is about search for legendary hero artifacts from a past age called legendary hero relics(very original). That being said we are given no indication on how this shows story will go. One episode they'll be searching for these relics and the next Ryner and Ferris will be wasting minutes discussing dumplings. There's literally little to no consistency in this shows tone. Which really wouldn't be so bad if that was what they were aiming for. However, that is definitely not the case as you'll see that shortly after these episodes about dumplings, going on a date and various other things we are given assassination attempts, wars and tales of hidden corruption. As a result this show has no flow, no sense of direction. Now I'm well aware that this was originally a light novel and perhaps this style of narration worked best for that format. But for an anime? Many times I found myself confused at to what was going on. This got worse especially towards the end. Where I assume the producers/studio found out that they had blown their budget and poorly managed the episodes and now suddenly had to fit 100 plot devices into the last 2-3 episodes. Seriously, I don't even know if what happened at the end could be called a cliffhanger. It all just felt very anti-climatic and rushed. Cliffhangers are supposed to build the tension for a possible(or in this case improbable) continuation. All this ending did was build more confusion. There are so many questions left unanswered at the end. Who is Ferris' brother? Why is Gastark so desperately after the relics? Is the lonely devil a special type of alpha stigma? And finally the most important question why the hell did a woman we've never even seen before pop up out of Ryner's body. I fear at the rate they're going even if they did continue this series it would take at least another 2 seasons before any of these questions get answered.

Legend of the legendary battle

The first season would ideally be about that big war they foreshadowed at the end. Yea I'm thinking big epic battles and more useless dialogue as Ryner & Ferris attempt to go all Kira & Lacus on us and stop the fighting with his overpowered alpha stigma hacks(ensuring everlasting popularity in japan but damning their appeal just about everywhere else). They'll be many casualties, and unlike the first season the only people to die won't just be redshirts. But I gurantee you somewhere along the way this war will get resolved. With the obvious outcome that Riphal must die. Indeed, at the end of this war Roland will triumph over Gastark. This is precisely because Sion's dark hero plot device hacks are stronger than Riphal's limb for city tactics. In the next great(exaggeration) season Sion and Ryner will have their very overdue and climatic battle. Sion will realize that even though he has defeated Gastark there are still enemies he must face. Pretty much setting up the pace for when Sion goes all Napoleon on us and loses his newly acquired empire. Yes, it is obvious that should Ryner and Sion ever face off both will die or only Ryner will live. This is how all good(predictable) stories must end. If Ryner manages to live Sion will tell him momentarily before he died that he just wanted to create a world for everyone and how he betrayed that ideal and how much of a fool he is.

It's fun to imagine the conclusion of series. So much fun I might just decide to get into the fan-fiction business. Alas, I doubt my fan-fiction would be very popular without some edits,  asit lacks the necessary amounts of yaoi(filth) that all successful fan-fiction must possess. Instead, I must devote myself to writing blog entries(that nobody but myself and my imaginary friends read). This is because no matter how terrible the subject or the writing, just about anything can be put into a blog(decide for yourself whether my own blog is the testament). Am I rambling again? Oh yea where was I legend of the legendary heroes.

Ultimately, this show wasn't that bad. It wasn't that great but I don't think it was trying to be great either. Rather, I think it was a show that tried to do a just adaptation. Whether or not they actually succeeded I'll leave that to the fans of the light novel to tell me. Lasting impressions? As far this last/current season went definitely ore no imouto and index s2 got most of the hype and attention (not enough lolis, moe or incest for DenYuDen to be  #1). I rather liked index season 1 and have yet to watch season 2 so I'll have to reserve my judgment. Ore no imouto? I have no intention to watch it, unfortunately I also had no intention to watch Angel Beats, yet I still watched it. Pretty much it was a lackluster season(as it's been lately). Next season promises us more loli, moe and slice of life. Words that as you should know by now do not make up my vocabulary of awesome anime. I'm just waiting to see how the adaptation of beezlebub will turn out. Being a fan of the manga I expect(but probably won't get) good things from the anime. My final comment Legend of the legendary heroes is omissible but if you miss the new Berserk series you will never be forgiven(just like Griffith).


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Heat (Ryoichi Ikegami & Buronson)

Hey Daimyo here ready to bring you all another(it's actually the first) Champion of a manga. If you've been following my reviews on MAL (which you probably haven't). You probably know by now the type of things I value in a series. Which are (obviously): action, violence, delinquents, yakuzas, martial arts, explosions, mechas, samurais among various other testosterone driven things. Now what if I told you all that Ikegami Ryoichi(Sanctuary) and Buronson(Hokuto no Ken) got together and made a manga? But wait what if I add in that this manga is 17 volumes long? If you're anything like me you'd go to the nearest sports store buy a baseball bat and bash everything in sight with glee thinking that the worst destruction you could create would only pale in comparison to Buroichi(combination) chaos.


Sanctuary(Banker)                                           Heat(Loan Shark)

 

Doppelganger!?

Earlier I mentioned the manga Sanctuary, which was definitely a golden manga. Storytelling, characters, setting everything was practically flawless. Also it met my previous condition of being full of violence(the sex was a bonus) it really made me appreciate the life of a yakuza. Or atleast the life of a manga yakuza. Now I tried many mangas and manwhas that I hoped could emulate this effect like strain(too sappy), sunken rock (no comment), even the anime Gungrave(which while I did like the feeling was not close). That is I why I orgasmed when manga scanlation group Easy Going Scans decided to pick up another begotten gem of manga.

Yes Heat just as you would expect from the title is indeed full of heat. The manga explores the exploits of Tatsumi Karasawa. A character who quite literally just doesn't give a fuck. He doesn't give a fuck about the police, he doesn't give a fuck about the yakuza and he doesn't give a fuck about you or me. Literally our first introduction to his character is him filming a porno where he screws the police chiefs wife in order to blackmail him. It is from that point on we are given a roller coaster that just explodes as it depicts the rise of an amateur street punk to crime boss.

But what really brings this work home is the dynamic art of Ryoichi Ikegami. His fantastic and realistic visuals easily bring the scenes to life. The characters almost look life-like and as result retain much of their natural Japanese characteristics, which are often absent in most manga drawings. Also I'm sure all of you by now know that when it comes to action sequences and violence related plots, leave it to Buronson to rape(in the best way imaginable) a good story. Now what could possibly go wrong. We have an unbeatable manga duo working together on a great manga. Well, plenty of things could go wrong. First and foremost this manga was completed in 2002(yea I know over a hundred years ago) and has only now begun the process of scanlation. As far as I know there are no licenses for this title nor any plans to. Which is really a shame because if they licensed other Ikegami works like Crying freeman(really shouldn't have continued past the first arc) and the first BuroIchi( #1 blow???) licensed work we see is Strain something is terribly wrong with the world we live in.

Well, it's not that bad. You know there's always that wise guy (jackass) out there that tells us to stop complaining about slow translations and learn japanese. Sir I salute you. If you are willing to learn roughly 1000-2000 Japanese-Chinese characters just to read one seinen manga you deserve more than a medal, you deserve a statue, hell no you deserve a gundam. I'll get you an f9...Hi nu with your name on it. We'll exchange the gundam for a wife/gf that will cook, clean and serve without complaints(impossible task). 

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